Sunday, January 27, 2013

Best friends for life…or this week anyway!


A few days ago I was talking with a co-worker about my best friend that lives in South Carolina. I had mentioned I was hoping to see her this summer and was looking forward to a girls weekend at some point as well. Later in the day, the same co-worker asked about my plans for the weekend at which point I replied that we were planning on having dinner with my best friend and her husband. She seemed confused and I couldn't understand why until she asked if my best friend was coming down for just the weekend. For whatever reason it wasn't until that moment that I realized just how many “best friends” I have.

At the ripe old age of 45, I have been blessed to have many wonderful friends throughout my life. Some I have known since I was a little girl while my newest best friend and I have only known each other a couple of months. The idea of a “best friend” has been an anomaly to me since I was a little girl.  For as long as I can remember, I have had several "best friends" at any given time. Whether it's a childhood friend, someone I have only known a short time, my sister, my daughter or my husband, I simply can't remember ever having just one best friend.

Now don't get me wrong, I understand how people, especially women, form friendships and bonds with other women and there is that one person who truly is a “best friend”; someone they go to no matter what and that is the only person they share their deepest secrets, fears and desires with. For me, there are a series of best friends that have come and gone throughout the years. It used to really bother me when I lost touch with a “best friend” and it still does at one level. At another level though, I have come to understand that, for me, friends truly do come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

Recently, it seems as though I have been reminded of this on a regular basis. Take my friend LeeAnn for example. LeeAnn and I grew up together in a very small farming community in the Florida Panhandle. It was a very small community so my mom had known her mom since they were young. When I moved away from my home town in the ninth grade, LeeAnn and I tried to stay in touch. At first we talked on the phone occasionally, I would go see her when my family would go back to visit my grandparents and we wrote to each other all the time. As the years passed, we both got married, had kids and it was not uncommon for a year or two to pass without us seeing each other or even talking. Then something would happen that would cause our paths to cross and suddenly we were best friends again. The last time I lost touch with LeeAnn was about ten or twelve years ago. I thought of her often but each time I would go back to our old home town, I never seemed to have time to look her up or if I did, despite the smallness of the town, I could never seem to easily locate her. Then, a few months ago, through the magic of the internet and Facebook, LeeAnn was back in my life. With the simple exchange of a few emails, we were all caught up and were best friends again.

The list of best friends over the years is too long to list. Some names I can recall without any effort at all and each one has a very special memory. There are others that I can vaguely recall but no real details that let me pinpoint a name or any exact details of the friendship. I only know they exist because I cannot remember a time in my life when I wasn’t blessed with having at least one “best friend”. Someone I could call anytime, day or night and know without a doubt they would be there if I needed them. Today is no different.

To list each of my current “best friends” would take more room than the space here (or your attention span) would allow. Each one is different and each friendship is as unique as the women themselves. No two friendships are the same and I think that's why I have so many “best friends”. They each have a reason for being in my life just as I hope I do to theirs. They each offer me a different perspective and manage to enhance my life in so many ways. The one thing that is true of all of them though is the fact that I know without a doubt, if something happened and I needed one of them, they are only a phone call away. In the same token, the same is true for them. I would be there with a simple phone call and request.
As time goes by and my life continues to change and grow, just as everyone else, I am sure there will come a time when another friendship will slowly fade away and a new friendship will take its place. I will mourn the loss of that friendship because I know just how special true friends are but I will also rejoice in the new friendships I will form. I will be thankful for each person whose path crosses mine and whom I am fortunate enough to call “best friend”...for a reason, for a season or for a lifetime.  

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